Tied~

Haiz... Too busy to update my blog... Currently having rest from packing~
Tomorrow move house... Not excited or interested..
But i had no choice..
My whole life just get controlled by my family...
WTH!!!
XD
K done with then resting and complaining....
Back to work!
Bye~!

Deep~

This just cant go the way u want it to be sometimes. Lots of people suffer because of this and obviously me and my friends are 1 of the them. Maybe we are not blessed enough to do what we really want. But i know everyone is trying their best to make their wish come true...
Like me, suffering from the pain in my heart is something normal already... No one understands the pain i endure, i hope no 1 does as well. Its unhealthy to endure such pain. I created a barrier so that i wont be hurt again and again and again... But how knows? i got hurt even with such barrier i had... Haha, dunno what to say ar, the only excuse i can give myself is not fated... haha... Someone i wish we never met in the first place and sometimes i really do wish to leave this town like u meantioned....
Truth sometimes can be painful and most of the time shocking... Pretending not to be shocked is nothing easy for me... But making myself not to care bout is is some hard thing~ Haha... No one can run from the truth, so i really have to deal with it. I dont know how to deal with the things i know now... I keep thinking bot it no matter what i am doing. Reading books, Playing Badminton, Playing games, Fitness training and even i bath also it appear in my mind~ This is when the word PEKCHEK is used. Hardly can concentrate what i wanted to do. Haha, God really have fun torturing me...
Yes~! Next monday i going for competition again. This time its a competition that i decided to play for fun. I am injured and i cant partner with the partner who got chance to win the competition. He thought i always angry with him but actually i am not angry with anyone but myself... I did mistakes that even myself cant forgive... I am sorry Lai... So i partner Daryl in this competition... Sorry Daryl, i dont mean ur not good enough to win, its just ur 15! and u still have a long way to go before u can reach the finals of a novice competition. I just want u to have experince in such competition, thats all..
I injured myself again in court today, The pain at my back was really burning... lucky i could endure the pain and played less agressive for the rest of the night... No one really noticed i injured myself, maybe i can go acting liao.. Haha.... I wanan buy pain killer soon. Even now when i am typing my post here i can feel the pain on my back...
See~ pain in the heart and i have to suffer from physical pain as well~! What a life huh? Hope someday i can escape from this kind of life. I know there is 1 east way to escape though.... But it isnt an option i can take now... I dont want to end my life now... There is really too many things i wanna go~! I will put my life in the line until i reaches my goal~! Haha~!!!!
K, i cant wristand the pain already.. gotta go drink something.. will post something more happy next time... Bye~

Steambot~

The continuation of my story last night... After my duck singing, we went Steambot.. First time having steambot with all of them.. Kind of funny... Unluckily it started drizzling while we just started. I insisted not to change the table cos we are too close to the rain... Soon the rain came bigger with strong winds... But actually before the rain really came my back was wet already.. XD
When we start eating.. everyone aimed at the 3-layer pork. We ate like never ate pork before... Soon i was kind of full cos i really ate alot... But the cooking competition between Karen and Chang continued.... They claim that they ate alot cos they cooked alot. Actually it was me, Jme and Cat whos eating... Our hot topic for the night was "Kiasu".. haha.. Well, most student in UCSI have the kiasu spirit. I cant deny myself not being kiasu either. Haha... Unfortunately the 2 kiasu cook keep cooking and the unlucky 3 have to safe the day with our mouths. Haha... Sim joined us but didnt eat. He came cos he was invited by he already eaten. It proofs that he really is a good guy after all since he didnt put us aeroplane.
Sim went of and our eating feast continue~ the oils keep "irrupting" causing damage on us. Kind of funny cos its like we are betting our own life just to wat something. Need to be aware of the irruption cos it hurts~!! Then Jme went for a walk to buy something... Then we actually want to kacau Karen say we prepared something for her coming birthday de... Who knows? i really decided to buy a cake for her at the near by cake house. I went with Jme and the other 3 sit there waiting and didnt know that i decided to buy the cake. When the cake arrived, she still think its a prank... But its real! Jme forget to say " surprise!" which is really funny when she say it after the cake was already cut. Haha.. No photos will be shown in this post because some are not good for health... Oonly those went will understand what i mean.
Happy Birthday Karen~!!!!
thats all for this post... dont really know what to write about the steambot... Its just eating...

Duck~

Lol, dont get negative thoughts because of my title... Its a funny 1, i think.
I went to sing K again today... It all started when i received a message from Chang. He say go out today. Go sing and steambot... I really want the steambot but didnt like the singing idea at all. I cant really sing and its really embarrassing singing in a room with all the pros from my uni... After considering awhile i decided to go lo. We went sang at 2. Oh man... Pros are really pros... totally different from ppl like me. I sang like donald duck sing ar... Then Chang say he sing like old duc, but i think he sing like Gary Chao Ge. Since there were only 2 boys and both call themself duck so i used duck as my title of this post lo.
Yes its embarrasing... can feel the pressure singing with them ar... I still prefer singing in my shower... XD But i am kind of proud also... Not everyone can sing like Donald Duck also~ Haha...
Sang a few songs then i prefer listen instead of singing... And i remember Jme laughed at me.... Haha... I admit it was really funny but kind of stupid too... XD Lucky no ppl record that part ar....
K liao, abit tired and dont really have the mood to type things liao... Will leave the Steambot part for the next post... Nite~~~

Talented?

Yes! School holiday begins! Been waiting for a holiday for a long time... But actually i am a bit worry about my finals' result. I know i didnt really do well in my finals. I hope i dont disappoint my lecturers and parents... Since weeks before our final i noticed everyone is really frustrated about the coming exam. From there i noticed some other things as well. I finally know who is really talented in our school.
There are many student studying diploma in our university. Business, Biotech, Logistic, and some degree student of Commerce. All together about 30 i think... I know most of them but they dont know me... haha is ok.. but i know everyone one of them either they are talented or not.
Haha, now i will start giving our names on who are talented... 1st, Jamie from diploma in logistic. She actually went for a holiday at KL before our stupid final exam. And her result are normally, the top few in her class. Haha, in logistic class of cos is consider top few. Even the msot lazy person is considered top cos there is only 3 person in logistic. Yes she is the number 1 in my logistic class. She got the talent of studying and have very good memory as well. Other than her, i dont really think anyone does have the talent of studying...
Ah wait, there is other 2. Catherine and Elsie from diploma of business and biotech. I really think they are clever and talented in studying as well. There goes for all top in the diploma offered in our school.
I cant say others that are not mentioned in my post are not talented. They are talented as well. For example, Chang have the talent of hardworking. Cant say he not gifted in studies la, just of he uses more of his hardworking talent. If he is not good in any subject he will try his best to get better result. Thats call hardworking! The others who have the talent of hardworking are, Ee Chia, Lee Chin, Justin, Jennifer, Paul, and maybe Karen got some as well. Sorry others not mentioned here i really dont think they have the talent of hardworking.
Others not mentioned are categories as the same category as me. The happy go lucky type. People in this category are narutally blessed. We all have the luck to score in our exams. Not genius but really luck. Most people in this category do thier things just for the sake of passing. The unlucky members in this category are, Me, Benjamin, Ek Han, Michelle, Margaret, and some others...
There are unlucky ones as well. They are my seniors who usually didnt attend class and didnt pass their exams. They are gifted as well! Gifted in wealth! No offence please.. i am just saying the real thing. I dont mean those in my category and those unlucky ones are not hardworking, just not enough~
No matter gifted or not gifted, got talent or not, it doesnt matter. We got each other! We will help each other so that we live the best out of our college life.
I am not talented in anything, but i am lucky i have my friends. Hi 5 to my friends! Haha...

Update~

Haha~ holiday!!! paiseh la~ tired liao... but at least i say something in my blog...
dont say didnt update blog...
so conclusion is... BLOG UPDATED!
nite~!!

Barrier~

Since then, every time i saw your name in Msn i cant forget the unforgettable conversation we had... It was really painful alright and its the truth... I could remember the feeling of warm tears in my eyes... But i wasnt crying... I really didnt...
Tomorrow will be the first day of my final exam. Many of my classmates started today but i spend most of my time at home, study watch tv and slept alot. I dont have the mood to concentrate anymore... Everytime i close my eyes, there are flash back to what happened although i dont want to remember anything about it at all... Now here i am, already past my bed time and i couldnt at all... i experienced insomnia and sometimes i barely slept at night...
Listening to my songs whenever i am sad or troubled... My songs arent updated so they are all old sons that i really like. Haha... I really hate exam period, no one online and no one to talk to... Maybe thats why i my results arent that good. I dont really spend my time revising... Dunno what, but i really like sitting in my computer room alone, it feels like i can do what ever i want here...
Owen always say me emo, i admit it! haha... Emo is not such a bad thing after all. When i emo, i could actually spend time thinking of my miserable life. But sometimes its really a headache. Like now, flash abck of out conversation keeps flashing back none stop. The pain in my heart keeps repeating and i am glad i dont have heart attack by now... No one really understand me, no one understand the pain i endured... but i dont mind... i know i can wrist and it...
Right now, I could feel a barrier between us. I used to be really scare of having barriers of communicating in my life, but now i am actually making the barrier myself. I dont really know why but i think its just because of phobia...
There are so many things that i really want to ask you but every time i type a message, before i send it i will delete it. I would tell myself not to go interrupt whatever u doing there, scared of what happened... It really cant be forgotten..
I think as time pass by, the barrier will grow thicker and thicker until 1 day i may forget your name but i definitely wont forget ur personality... I am not evading from my problems, just i dont know what else to do...
Someday, i will still remember the times when my tears fall and of cause will remember the pain experience i had as it will definitely become a scar in my heart. A permanent scar in my life.....
Dont worry, there is no one to be blamed cos this is just how a life is right? I will just let God decide on my fate from now on...
OK feeling kind of sleepy already... I go sleep and get ready for tomorrow's Financial Accounting Exam. Haha... Bye~ Good night!!